I THINK THAT most of us would agree (except for those of us who don’t agree) that we live in a time of hyper-partisanship (depending upon whose side you’re on).
Extremes. Opposites. Extreme opposites.
Left vs. right, rich vs. poor, liberal vs. conservative, this color and that nationality and this religion and that social “deviation” and this morality and … whew.
It’s exhausting just trying to keep on which side you’re on about what.
Well, friends and neighbors, I’m here today to tell you that I (me, personally — I can do this) have found The Answer.
The Solution to the travails that prevail, The Ultimate Fix for the future, The Permanent Solution to most of the Problems: mothers.
No, that’s it: mothers. Nothing comes after that, just “mothers.”
Think about it: What’s the one thing that unites us all, other than a nodding acquaintanceship with humanity?
Right. Mothers. Almost all of us have one or had one — or several.
Mothers.
The thing that we can all agree upon as the mode of preference for getting “here” from wherever we started from.
Further, they come in all shapes, sizes, colors, nationalities and cultures, and don’t require batteries.
They’re everywhere. Distributed equitably to the exact proportion of people present.
Mothers.
Mothers rule. Or mothers should rule.
Consider: What do mothers usually want for their children?
Right: the best thing, which almost always gets generalized to wanting the best thing for other mothers’ children.
Do mothers want their children to fight? No.
To get hurt? No.
To hurt somebody else? No.
To be bullies? No.
To eat their vegetables? Yes.
Why? So they’ll be healthy. As in not sick.
As in not in need of health care.
Do mothers want their children to act like arrogant … people?
Like conceited, self-centered, holier-than-thou miscreants? No.
Why? Because it would embarrass the family and reflect poorly on their upbringing.
Think about it: What’s the one force that flies in the face of military might?
Right. Trust me on this: Every male there has ever been knows full well that the most dangerous thing on the planet is an angry mother anything.
We don’t even attempt to fight; we just run.
So enforcement (e.g., compliance with good manners and effective oral hygiene) is absolute and unequivocal.
On the gentler side, who is more likely to forgive us, comfort us, encourage us and teach us?
To fortify us with the strength of adulthood over perpetual adolescence?
To remind us of our roots and professionally launder our wings?
And who, pray tell, is more utterly omnipresent?
We carry our mothers around with us.
We hear their voices and chafe under their scoldings.
They out-conscience conscience because they are “conscience.”
Imagine a hallowed government hall, on a national or global level, filled with nothing but mothers.
Do we imagine that any of them would say, “Oh, I have a good idea! Let’s go to war so my kids can get killed.”
No.
Withholding food? Water? Medicine? Clean underwear?
No.
Blindly obeying the imagined edicts of quasi-congruent ideologies to the detriment of the grandchildren?
Like hell.
It wouldn’t happen. Things would get better because there’s nothing else they could do or be allowed to do.
So, there it is.
That’s all there is to it: getting back to nature’s roots and the natural order of things, swapping civility in place of hostility, maturity in place of pomposity and washing our hands before we go to the table.
There is hope.
Happy Mother’s Day!
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Mark Harvey is director of Clallam/Jefferson Senior Information &Assistance, which operates through the Olympic Area Agency on Aging. He is also a member of the Community Advocates for Rural Elders partnership. He can be reached at 360-452-3221 (Port Angeles-Sequim), 360-385-2552 (Jefferson County) or 360-374-9496 (West End), or by emailing harvemb@dshs.wa.gov.
