PAT NEAL: Have a pleasant Fourth

Published 1:30 am Wednesday, July 1, 2026

AS WE APPROACH the 250th anniversary of the birth of the United States, we do so with a sense of the history of the celebration of this great nation.

The party started on July 4, 1776, when Congress officially adopted Thomas Jefferson’s Declaration of Independence, but it took another year to get things rolling with an organized July 4 celebration in 1777 in Philadelphia and Boston.

Public readings of the Declaration of Independence were followed by parades, bonfires and, of course, fireworks.

So, it is not surprising that, these days, things tend to get a little out of hand on the Fourth.

Talk to any first responder or emergency room worker, and you’ll soon understand why the Fourth of July is known as the most dangerous holiday in America.

From the ptomaine potato salad at the potluck picnic gone bad to the drunken fireworks carnage, the Fourth of July has become a least-favorite holiday for many Americans.

The casualties are already starting to mount.

Beginning with the 700 pounds of fireworks that exploded in a house in the Whidbey Island neighborhood in Greenbank last week.

The blast destroyed two homes and damaged a third, injuring five people — including two firefighters — who are expected to recover.

Neighbors had reported the homeowner who had collected the fireworks was smoking earlier in the day. Which turned out to be not such a good idea.

My own Fourth of July celebration will be less explosive, centered around a grand tradition just happening now.

The ripening of the first blackberries, which will lead to the celebration of the first pie of the year.

We pick the small native blackberries that grow far from the roads in secret patches only the bears know about.

The first blackberry pie is a celebration of all that is right with America, picking your berries before someone else does.

The pie will be served at the Hoh River Guide Association’s Fourth of July picnic, where tall tales and fine cuisine convene, in a quiet corner of the wilderness.

This is a drug- and alcohol-free event, so no one is expected to show up. I can eat the whole pie myself.

It all harkens back to an earlier time when the Fourth of July was not such an ostentatious display of excess.

In 1852, James Gilchrist Swan described a Fourth of July party at his tent at Shoalwater, now Willapa Bay. He reported the day was ushered in by a tremendous bonfire on Pine Island that was answered by everyone who had a gun and powder blazing away.

The entertainment consisted of the reading of the Declaration of Independence, extracts of Daniel Webster’s oration on John Adams and Thomas Jefferson and a speech of his own composed by a man named Russel.

The menu for the celebration included a great oyster pie, boiled ham, cold pudding, pies, donuts and loaves of bread.

At the termination of the feast, there was what was described as a “feu-de-joie,” or the firing of every gun and rifle of the whole company.

Once these ceremonies were over, it was proposed to close the performance by filling a massive cedar stump with spruce limbs and setting it ablaze, which made the best bonfire Swan ever saw.

It set fire to the forest and burned until the fall rains put it out.

All agreed they had never had a “pleasenter” fourth.

Here’s hoping you all have a pleasant Fourth.

Stay out of the emergency room and the jail.

Don’t blow up your house, and please try to keep your bonfire under 1 acre.

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Pat Neal is a Hoh River fishing and rafting guide and “wilderness gossip columnist” whose column appears here every Wednesday.

He can be reached at 360-683-9867 or by email via patnealproductions@gmail.com.