Skulptures Precarious Aquarius and Screws Loose line up for the Art Parade on Saturday on Water Street in Port Townsend. Both teams were Master Award winners after completing the entire race in the specified time limits, having the same pilots throughout and not removing equipment from their skulpture. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

Skulptures Precarious Aquarius and Screws Loose line up for the Art Parade on Saturday on Water Street in Port Townsend. Both teams were Master Award winners after completing the entire race in the specified time limits, having the same pilots throughout and not removing equipment from their skulpture. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

Great Port Townsend Bay Kinetic Race competitors claim ‘Mediocrity,’ other awards

14 skulptures took part in 37th annual event

PORT TOWNSEND — The 37th annual Great Port Townsend Bay Kinetic “Skulpture” Race gave rise to a variety of award winners, but not in ways normally expected.

Last weekend played host to 14 man-powered moving skulptures that were put to the test by racing through water, sand, mud and city neighborhoods.

Judges evaluated the skulptures, pilots and pit crew on artwork, costumes, pageantry, attitude and whatever else they felt appropriate.

The races are all in good fun and are not meant to be taken seriously.

The most coveted prize of the race is the “Mediocrity Award” for finishing dead center of the pack, and winners received $200, a reflector jacket from Broken Spoke and a paver made by “Top Kop” John Lizwacko that weighed more than 100 pounds, said Marilyn Kurka, Kinetic Race head judge.

“Always a joke to make [the paver] as heavy as possible and see if they can carry it out,” Kurka said.

The winner of the Mediocrity Award this year was Lobster Pot Family Man.

Six teams won the Master Award by completing all portions of the race, keeping the same pilots throughout and keeping all parts of the skulpture attached at all times.

The winning skulpture teams were Tow Mater, Screws Loose, Precarious Aquarius, Lobster Pot Family Man, Muirgan the Mermaid and the Spaghetti Monster.

This year’s Rosehips Kween was “Kween Pearlificent,”also known as Rachel Cervantes.

Skulpture Celestial Navigation with pilots Amber and Collin Bartl ride in the Art Parade on Saturday as they head to the break test and water portion of the Kinetic Race. The skulpture won the Lucky Duck award for the amount of duct tape that the team used throughout the weekend’s activities. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

Skulpture Celestial Navigation with pilots Amber and Collin Bartl ride in the Art Parade on Saturday as they head to the break test and water portion of the Kinetic Race. The skulpture won the Lucky Duck award for the amount of duct tape that the team used throughout the weekend’s activities. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

Other award winners are:

• Lucky Duck — Celestial Navigation for the best use of duct tape after pilot Collin Bartl sliced off the tip of his finger before the race and wrapped it in paper towels and duct tape and attended the race. He then also made repairs to his skulpture during the race that also required duct tape.

• Dress to Kill — Huggin Dogs for the best use of theme throughout the skulpture.

• Teddy Bear — Huggin Dogs for the best teddy bear. (The team had a stuffed dog doll that had its own miniature teddy bear)

• Volunteer — Josh and Amber Jones for the volunteer work they’ve done with the race, especially with organizing the Rosehips Kween Koronation Ball.

• Shark Bite — Lobster Pot Family Man for being the fastest in and out of the water.

• Sand Crab — Marianna the Sea Turtle for the most skill and showmanship getting through the sand. The team intentionally didn’t use sand tires and used much effort to peddle through the sand to entertain the crowd

• Krazy Koncept — More Damn Vikings From Poulsbo for their unique skulpture of having two three-wheel two-person bikes attached on either side of a canoe.

• Big Cheese — Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride for embodying the spirit of race founder Hubert Brown.

• Most Time — Muirgan the Mermaid for spending the longest time on the course but still completing it.

“We think it’s glorious to spend the most time on the course,” Kurka said.

• Rump Roast — Muirgan the Mermaid for the best art on the back-end of the skulpture, which had a moving mermaid tail.

• Glorious Specktator — Muirgan the Mermaid for being the crowd-voted favorite.

• Kroon a Toon — Precarious Aquarius for the performance Sunday during the pageantry portion of the race.

• Engineering — Screws Loose for having the best engineering of any that completed the entire course. The team was able to reduce their skulpture by 300 pounds from last year.

• Moxie — Shannon Black-Nowell won the Moxie Award, named after Kurka for the volunteer who comes back every year.

“You just don’t quit, you keep going … you do it with a smile on your face and positive attitude,” Kurka said.

• It’s the Pits! — Sunkest for the team’s pit crew, who lifted the entire skulpture to help reorient it on the sand track.

• Bribe-a-licious — Sunkest for the best bribe to the judges in the form of an anchor necklace.

• Cruddy Muddy — The Spaghetti Monster for the fastest time through the mud, completing it in two minutes, while other teams struggle to complete it in the allotted 15 minutes.

• Least Time — Tow Mater for the fastest time to finish the race.

• Breast of Show — Tow Mater for the best front end artwork on his skulpture.

• Racer’s Favorite — Yellow Skrubmarine for being voted the racers favorite because the 14-year-old pilot Alice Curry had many struggles throughout the race but “she just had a great attitude, she just kept going and going,” Kurka said.

Skulpture Tow Mater during the Art Parade on Saturday. Tow Mater won the Masters Award for finishing all portions of the race, the Breast of Show award for the best artwork on the front of the machine and the Least Time award for finishing the race first. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

Skulpture Tow Mater during the Art Parade on Saturday. Tow Mater won the Masters Award for finishing all portions of the race, the Breast of Show award for the best artwork on the front of the machine and the Least Time award for finishing the race first. (Zach Jablonski/Peninsula Daily News)

This year’s race activities saw double the amount of participants in the art parade and had hundreds of supporters on the sidelines.

Kurka is happy with how the weekend went. The part that really stuck with her, however, is how Curry had many issues with her skulpture completing the sections of the race but persevered through the challenges with a smile on her face.

“That was probably the best thing I saw,” Kurka said. “I just like seeing kids doing this and not only that, setting a better example for us adults.

“All in all I think it was a great year.”

________

Jefferson County reporter Zach Jablonski can be reached at 360-385-2335, ext. 5 or at [email protected].

The Paver Award that was made by “Top Kop” John Lizwacko weighs more than 100 pounds. It was given to the Lobster Pot Family Man team as part of the earnings for the Mediocrity Award for finishing the race in the dead center of the pack. (Kinetic Race Facebook Page)

The Paver Award that was made by “Top Kop” John Lizwacko weighs more than 100 pounds. It was given to the Lobster Pot Family Man team as part of the earnings for the Mediocrity Award for finishing the race in the dead center of the pack. (Kinetic Race Facebook Page)

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